Thu Apr 16 2009 8:48pm PDT
Mood: painfully patient
Music: Jason Mraz - I\'m Yours
Lately I feel like Morpheus from The Matrix. As he first contacts Neo. \"You\'ve been looking for me for a couple years but I\'ve been looking for you my whole life.\"
A series of events put into place a couple years ago leading to an interesting confluence of events criss-crossing till finally.... well let me start at the beginning. A couple (more like 3yrs ago now) years ago I started getting a feeling she was near. I couldn\'t shake the feeling but knowing that she didn\'t go to my church. I set out to visit different ones in the area hoping I could bump into her. But to no avail. I gave up awhile and got distracted. The feeling never faded but I chose to ignore it as it kinda annoyed me, like someone teasing you carrot and stick style.
Then one evening, she walked in the door, beautiful, curvy, sweetest personality you ever knew, fun, and wise. But the moment sometime later wasn\'t right. No, not right at all because of him. Seeing the situation before I already knew the outcome. So I wait.
In the mean time, I got the connecting pieces of info for the things I\'ve been charged to do in my stay on this rock. And oddly enough it connected what I knew was coming concerning wealth with how to get there and then seeing how it relates to something else I found true. Was interesting to hear the same from an older trustworthy person, this connection. All this seemingly coming together at the same time. Odd timing in events or the execution of a plan? So now I study.
I stayed in touch with her but denied myself any thought of her till I saw signs of the outcome coming true. Now that I do see them coming true, I wonder if the specifity of it will also come true. That is, failure at month 4.
I can\'t yet say where to go from here, other than lots and lots of prayer. But I do hope that someday I can look back and think of this scene from The Matrix. Trinity: \"do you think we found him?\" Morpheus: \"i dont think it. i know it!\"